'Jersey Shore' Starts With A Jersey Bore [FULL EPISODE] [VIDEO]

What the ef???

What the hell happened? (Will Farrell voice) I was so excited to see the new episode of Jersey Shore last night that I literally made my own pasta so that I could get the full authentic Italian vibe. Heh. But to my dismay what they showed was the remainder of last season in Florence. Come on man. I thought the Situation and Snooki drama by this time was done, but I remember this is immediately post Florence. I guess this is why the cast was hosting the first episode instead of giving us new problems from new situations. Well unfortunately that ain't the case in this situation. Apart from the body of JWOWW being even more amazing and Sammi introducing her new personality of boring-er I really see nothing to fist pump about yet. Here's how I see it...

I can already see the MTV persuasion  of The Situation to start shit with Snooki. This is why I love MTV. They know how to make the show worth watching.

The Situation is already on the prowl for Snooki and her blood. The guy is relentless to give up the fact he slept with her. Not sure if you know Mike but, WE KNOW. I'm not mad though you at least made the first episode worth watching. Keeping us on our toes to see if the 'ingredients to the bomb' would spill the beans to Jionni

Ok Snooki, time to stop being fake, or stop being yourself. Sorry that just makes sense to me. Snooki I see your career immediately over after the show is done. No exercise videos, no liquors, just a lot of stupid stuff stupid people buy. Please do something aside from lie this season, go back to getting drunk and having fun, don't let Jionni change you from being all you can be.

Ronnieeee... He's the man, everything that I think, Ronnie says. Now that he's not uber asshole he's the commentator of truth. Michael Buffer couldn't be more clear when he states the imminent. Thanks Ronnie for not being lame anymore. If you were single you'd be even more cool too. Just a thought.

Deena oh Deena where art thou? I barely noticed Deena this episode except for the camera pans showing her disgustingly jealous face. Sorry Deena, yes Ryder is a loose goose but she's also hotter. If I were the producers I would have had the cameras on the hotter girls too, that what kept a majority of the men tentative last night. JWOWW yes, Sammi yes, Ryder yes but you NO. I'm just sorry, so wipe the sour face away and start drinking dammit.

Veni, vidi, vici. Psyche. Not even, this guy Vinny hasn't conquered anything yet if he can't be away from home without sapping up. I don't get it, when does a grown man become accustomed to living on their own. A trip to Italy and tons of cash would make me happy to know I can at least visit home when I want to. Sadly, that's not my case but Vinny guy you gotta grow a pair. Come on, man up son.

JWOWW, all I want to say is I'm sorry I can't be guido, but I still love ya. Whew. Just keep on being JWOWW.

Pauly D got laid last night by the loose goose. At least he had a nice line for it though. Definitely not worth repeating because I just wouldn't live by it haha. If my boys hit it, at least 2 of them well then I won't be dipping my finger in that frosting jar. Pauly D is the funniest cast member and I'm quite sure he'll manage.

Sammi girl you're doing good, you're doing good. Just don't have any relapses and Snooki should take the title home two years in a row. The title of Drama Queen delusional liar. Hey, we're only human. 

andddddddddddd Ryder is a loose goose and The Unit is irrelevant.

FULL EPISODE

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#Weeds Season 8 Focusing on who shot the Shooter or who the Shooter shot??

Here ye Here ye, let me be the first I hope to give you some fresh pondering to do. Now as we all know season 7 of Weeds ended with a quite literal "bang". Now if you haven't watched that episode yet I suggest you go and read my previous post WHO SHOT NANCY first. So people, we have been asking ourselves who actually shot or may have been Nancy's shooter. My question is Why So Serious? I mean the bigger and better question out there I believe is who the hell shot the supposed shooter. I've been reading comments from here to there and it seems as though no one gives a damn about who may have saved our beloved Nancy's life. If we are all really intrigued about who I believe DIDN'T shoot Nancy then why aren't we heads over heels about who just gave us a new season; I hope. Crazy people.

Let's start with this, we all know Nancy didn't get shot. You said it yourself in your comments. What we do know is that there was a gun and then a gun shot. We also know that the shot was a tad bit louder than what the "normal" perception of a silenced shot would sound like. Face the facts we all don't know what a silenced gun sounds like but we all have probably heard one on a video game or Lifetime movie. So when we hear the loudness of this shot I don't believe it was the silenced rifle. I feel as though one of our favorite past time friends may have returned for a visit. Perhaps Heylia had something to say to Nancy, maybe even make amends after she got robbed. Heylia has a gun right? Didn't she shoot that gun through the window at one of the thieves? And didn't that shot sound loud and thorough like any meaty shot from a revolver of that caliber should sound? Hmm, well that's a quite possible scenario.

Another quite capable shooter of the shooter would be Guillermo Garcia-Gomez. Where the shit goes the pigeons follow? Hey maybe not but he doe's have his smarts and could possibly have known that Nancy was in trouble. Maybe somehow him knowing about Tim Scottson looking for Nancy led him to go and warn her, in this case perfect timing. Say Esteban doesn't want Nancy dead at the hands of someone else, maybe he's protecting her. He does have privileged access to privileged information doesn't he? I doubt this would be it but hey never know. One thing I know for sure is that it wasn't Isabelle and it wasn't Conrad, but I hope it's Conrad because the show needs him. If it was any of the Hodes family it would be Dean. After the robbery he has a great reason to carry a gun and plenty of reasons to want to find and speak with Nancy. Celia Hodes I hope stays away because she just causes problems.

Ok, so now I'm going to throw my best bet out there. Well my best two bets. First, Detective frank Oullette. He has all the reasons to want to spy on Nancy and courtesy of Shane the 411 on all her whereabouts. Seeing as though a large scale bust on a previous large scale mover - she went to jail as proof - would give him the uplift in spirit he needs I doubt he'd let somebody take his bacon. It would however blow his cover but he could in smart cover that up with a simple "I'm visiting Shane" excuse. This maybe would bring him on as a player for Nancy or give him the gratification of stopping an attempted assassination. Jenji Kohan said the sniper was a previous season cast member meaning anyone we saw on this season can't be the sniper. This means the Detective is prime candidate with rhyme and reason to have a gun, spy on Nancy and be obligated to protect and to serve. Sounds good to me.

Last but not least my second bet would be Emma Karlin. That tramp has nothing better to do. Not sure where she'd get the gun. But if there's some teamwork to be worked on than this right here is a clear cut "I do" in Nancy's trust book. Make sense?

So WHO Shot The Shooter?

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#Weeds Season 7 Finale Hit Us but Who got Hit?

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